The Still Face ExperiMent
You can tell a lot from watching someone's face.
Especially if it's your mother.
Dr. Edward Tronick conducted experiments to demonstrate an infant’s ability to read and react to social situations.
When, as children, we are attended to properly, we internalize a consistent sense of goodness and “okayness” from our primary caregivers. They don’t have to be perfect, only needing to repair when they haven’t attended to us when we needed them.
I’m showing this video to be validating. Either you got enough or you missed out. If you still need some, your parent (and by extension, your spouse, friends and children) cannot give enough to satisfy that primal need. You must give it to yourself now. There are ways to heal and a qualified mental health clinician or psychologist can help.